Pressures in an Indian household from old traditions or standards can often create a huge burden on children. One big pressure faced by children are career issues.
We always hear stories about how many parents insist that their children become doctors or engineers because they think the pay is high; this will increase stability, it will make their reputation rise, and keep their children happy. However, one thing Indian parents do not realize is that the children who do not want to enter these professions to begin with are often holding a weight on their shoulders and forcefully doing a career they have no interest in. This can take a serious mental toll on the children, who then are afraid to speak their mind about what they love. To emphasize, this is not me saying that all Indian parents force their children into these careers. In fact, more parents are now becoming open to allowing their children to expand their professional choices. At the end of the day, we can’t blame our parents and grandparents for the careers they plan for us because they only want the best for us, don’t want us to struggle financially, or face the hardships they have faced as immigrants.
A Question to Ask Yourself
Out of all your Indian friends, how many of them are actually in a career other than business, medicine, or engineering? This is not only due to the pressure from parents but also the Indian society. The Indian culture can oftentimes be very judgmental in how they see other people’s children.
If someone becomes a doctor, the news about that person becoming a doctor spreads in less than a day to every household; however, if someone becomes a teacher or chef, professions that aren’t as valued in the Indian community, then no one tends to become aware of it.
Every job is equally important and needed in the world despite the pay and hours it has. Our society needs to understand that without Indian teachers, our children would not have bilingual teachers to help our children obtain an education, without Indian chefs, we would not be able to dine at popular Indian restaurants, and without Indian fashion designers, we would not have our traditional outfits to wear. This goes to show how essential these careers are to our lives even if they may not be the highest paying ones. There are many careers in the world that are undermined by the Indian community, and I think now our generation is doing very well at choosing different professions.
Perspective of a Soon to be High School Teacher
You do not often hear about many Indians choosing to become teachers but one of my friends, Twinkle Patel, stands as a huge influence on tackling these career choice stereotypes. Based on our conversation, Twinkle stated that she started off on the Pre-Health track because her parents wanted her to do it, but then switched to teaching because she realized this was her true passion. At first her parents were against her switching because she was the first to go into teaching in her family and told her to try engineering instead. But eventually she convinced them, and they were very open and supportive of her decision. Twinkle’s main advice for you all is, “don’t let small minds convince you that your dreams are too big.”
The Life of a DJ
Another postive example is Yesh Sheth, who started DJing when he was in High School after discovering his passion for music from his dad and booking his first gig from his uncle. His parents were always supportive of him DJing events. However, every time he books an event now, the first question they ask him is how much he will be getting paid, and he feels that this is their biggest concern. For Yesh, he is DJing is his “happy place,” and the money does not matter. He often asks his parents if he can become a full time DJ after graduating college but they are always hesitant and he never truly gets the answer he wants. He knows that at the end of the day he will get his degree in IDS and CS and will DJ as well, proving to everyone that he can make a career out of it.
Key to Success
Overall, if you are having one of the highest paying jobs ever and aren’t happy doing it then what’s the point; you’re just gonna feel miserable. Oftentimes when we chose to go a different path, we are told to do the career or hobby on the side by our parents. Instead let's try to find a way to turn our hobbies into careers. Twinkle and Yesh are great examples of defying the stereotypes by following their passion, showing how we should be having these important conversations with our parents.
At the end of the day, do not let anyone dim your sparkle and choose a career that you feel the most passionate about because success will eventually follow. Remember that every career is valuable!
Written By: Nishita Patel